Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Susan Doesn't Wash Her Underwear

I like the Found Poetry Review on Facebook and today they posted a poetry prompt which I found very inspiring because I could use the OULIPO style of poetry.  I learned about this while I was poetry class last term.

OULIPO is when you take any written work be it an article, book, or even another poem and then you take all the nouns and change them by putting  a constraint on it. The most common is n+7. You look the word up in the dictionary and go seven words from the word (make sure you stick with  nouns). If you do this, use a real dictionary, the online generators do not work as well. You can read more about OULIPO at poets.org.

Okay now, the poetry lesson is over. Here is how I created the poem.

The original text came from page 32 from the book Susan, Be Smooth by Nell Giles.  I  used  the 1969 The Random House Dictionary of the English Language (I really need an updated dictionary). I used the constraint of n+7ish. I ignored all words that had the same word in a compound word such as bath salts, all proper nouns, all words that were different parts of speech,  and all archaic words.

Here is the original text:

While you let your bath water run, wash your underwear in a fluff of soap flakes. You’ll find it very easy to keep your "chores" down to a minimum if you follow this simple routine.

In fresh, soapy water rinse out your stockings ... then swish everything through several clear waters and there they are, ready to be hung to dry on coat hangers on the shower rod. (This is what happens to Susans who live in city apartments, of course. Country Susans have whole back porches of cool, dark breezes.) In town or country, we still believe that Susan should wash her own underwear and should do it night by night rather than in a lump. In this way you stay clean as you go along... you won’t spend a Saturday afternoon washing your underwear, when you’d rather have a date.

Here is the OULIPO poem called Susan Doesn't Wash Her Underwear

While you let
your batman wave run,
wash your undine
in a fluke of sobriety flamingos.
You’ll find it very easy to keep your “chorus”
down to a ministration-
if you follow this simple row.

In fresh, soapy wave
rinse out your stoicism...
then swish through several clear waves
and there they are, ready to be hung
to dry on cobble hangnails on the show-off roe.
(This is what happens to Susans who live in civics, of course.
Coupler Susans have whole back porks of cool, dark brews.)

In toxin or coupler,
we still believe that Susan
should wash her own undine
and should do it nil by nil rather than in a lunatic.
In this weakfish, you stay clean as you go along...
you won’t spend a Saturday age washing your undines,
when you’d rather have a dawn.

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Week 1.5 of Nanowrimo 14 and Other Less Important Stuff

Well I am working on my next novel, I have 17,900 words. Oh I know I am behind but I have not been slacking. I have been doing a ton of stuff. Last year, I wasn't in school and I didn't have much freelance work but this year I am in school and I have a lot of freelance work. I am making the time to write which is the most important thing. Because this is something I don't normally do- make an honest effort to write. I am doing it and I am hoping this weekend I will catch up. Fingers crossed...

I am in advertising class and part two of humanities. I really like my advertising class. Copywriting- count me in. Not going to switch majors because I would not like the actual business of advertising. It is pretty cut throat. Hell I don't always bid on jobs on Odesk for whatever reason. In advertising we are working on group project which is PITA (pain in the ass) because juggling so many people and getting stuff done deadline is three steps short of a nightmare but what are you going to do.

We had our first snow of the season. It started light this afternoon and we got a dusting. It feels like winter which in my opinion is too early for me. I would rather winter to start in  December. Lately, it hasn't been very sunny. Many days are overcast with that look of rain or snow or something unpleasant.

That is about it. Short sweet and right to the point. Always would appreciate cheer leaders as I race to finish the 50,000 words on time.

Till we meet again

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Nanowrimo- New Novel and Other Going Ons

I decided to participate again in Nanowrimo (National Novel Writing Month for those who don't know). This year I had not one but two story ideas. So far with three days in, I am maintaining word count barely but it's there.

The novel is called Gone Before Dawn and this is what its about in a nutshell. A bus with teenagers disappear (more than likely through a worm hole or other dimension portal) on their way to a field trip at an amusement park. While they are there, the one mother on our side is trying to find them when a psychic named Moira Ponds tries to help. This is more a thriller novel. I suppose there are some scary things but it is not horror, or at least not horror in my mind.  I am still getting to know my characters and my direction is not all there so I am struggling with the writing but somehow I keep plugging away. Somewhere in the middle, I get a lot more written in a day.

I have been rather busy working on freelancing and school. The term ended two weeks ago and I still have a 4.0. I got an "A" in my poetry class and an "A" in my Communications class. I am taking the second part of Humanities and Advertising. I am looking forward to really getting down to business in Advertising. We are supposed to work in groups. So I am busy but I still spend a little too much time playing Candy Crush (I only played once yesterday)

So what else has been going on? That's about it. The weather has been on a rollercoaster for the last two weeks. I did not get enough candy Trick or Treating on Friday, could have used more Resee's and more chocolate bars. We had a whole week of leaf peeping. Snow fell somewhere in Pennsylvania and it's a matter of time before I get snow. This month we have Thanksgiving and the one thing I can't wait for is pumpkin pie.  MMMM pumpkin pie. I entered a short story contest for the Boston Review.

And there you go, if notice no empty promises of what I am posting in the future. We know I work on a different time.  Till next time...

Monday, November 3, 2014

Santa's Shorts on Sale Now

Sorry for a late posting on this. I have been busy (okay not as busy I should be) I will be writing more later. I just wanted to let you know my Christmas Short Story and Poetry collection,Santa's Shorts  is ON SALE NOW (November 3, 2015). You still have a couple of days to get it at the cheaper. That is the link for the US market and it is on sale in the UK market as well.

Well now that it is November, it is definitely time to think about Christmas.

Till next time, pet the random neighborhood dog and pee on a fire extinguisher.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Softly, Quietly, Calmly

According to dictionary.com an adverb is " a word that modifies verbs, clauses, and in English and Latin modifies other adverbs and adjectives."  Most of us know them as the "-ly" words with some other ones like well, very, rather, more, etc.

There is a quote by Stephen King that is plastered everywhere, "The road to hell is paved in adverbs"
But if you read Under the Dome (and this is another whole blog post) there are a lot of adverbs. There tends to be this school of thought among the literati that adverbs are bad and if you use them then you are bad.

Am I really concerned about what the literati think of me? I know I am not part of that snobby class. Here's a quick side note on my place in the literature- I once joined an online writing group and it was open season for the new girl. Basically (adverb), I was mainstream and I had no place in the group. There were some to defend me. Needless to say, I quit the group. Back to adverbs...

We learn adverbs in school. If good writing doesn't use adverbs (might want to tell Dan Brown because he used "quietly" a lot in in the DaVinci Code) Then what is the sense of learning adverbs? So we as writers know to delete them right away? Or is it so we can play "Mad Libs" effectively(adverb)? Are adverbs really all that bad? No, they are not. And I highly doubt the road to hell is paved with them, really the road to hell is paved in Nazi skeletons, blood, murder,  and the hands of serial killers.

But, you say, doesn't the quote mean to show not tell? An adverb tells and doesn't show us anything... That is true but sometimes an adverb is the right word. It adds ambiguity. Which the literati just love ripping apart creative writing looking for the why- why did the writer do this or do that? My question, as a writer, why do I have to show you everything? Can't you come up with your thoughts and use your imagination? Using adverbs makes the reader the judgment for himself on the motive of the sentence.

And when it comes to poetry an adverb, sometimes, is just to nice to say, it glides off the tongue.

I don't know who makes up the rules for writing and who says what is in and what is not in. You know what I don't give a crap about the rules. I don't give a crap about the mysterious literati. I if I want to use adverbs, then fuck I will, sparingly of course...

Till we meet again.

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Mickayla Margarella on Sale Now

Hey all, This is a quick post just to let you know my ROMANCE novelette is one sale now through Kindle countdown deals. It is called Mickayla Margarella and it is about a woman who leaves her family for the seductive high life of Hollywood but does she find true love in the end? That is the question you will answer when you read the book. It is one sale through 10.16.2014 and right now on this day it is a 99 cents but will rise in price as the days go on.

On a side note, I just want to know your opinion, why am I ignored? Why don't I get reviews on my books although I know people buy them or borrow them so I am guessing they read them? Am I boring? Do I not incite any thoughts at all?

I am tired of being ignored. And the thing is, I don't know how to encourage anyone to talk about my work. I've tried begging and then reverse phycology but nothing is working. Any thoughts on how to encourage reviews. What makes a person take that step and write a few words?

Until next time...

Friday, October 3, 2014

Santa's Shorts- Christmas Short Stories and Poems by JM Scott

Yes, I love things that go bump in the night, blood, guts, gore, zombies, vamps, werewolves, witches and Christmas. I've always loved Christmas, the good will toward men, the cookies, the presents, being Santa Claus, the Christmas movies,  and all that happy horseshit. I've had plans for this book for a couple of years now and it is come to fruition (I really like the word fruition so I plan on using it a lot.) Anyway, two of the stories you may have read before because there were on here. Were is the operative word because I only left samples of the stories this way you would buy the book.

So what in tar nation is Sannta's Shorts? It is a collection of short stories and poems that center around that red and green, silver and gold holiday- Christmas.   Every year, for the last couple of years  I wrote a Christmas themed poem and every year for the last three, I wrote a Christmas short story.  (Yes, Nikolaus is a Christmas story in some demented way) and I wanted to put them all together. If you look at the sample the first poem is a sonnet. Yes, a sonnet. I wrote it for my poetry class at school and I think it turned out really nice.

Here's what's included in the book:

Christmas Memories, sonnet
Welcome Christmas, renku (linked haiku)
And He Gave Them Christmas a short story that takes place in the Great Depression where a boy learns the meaning of Christmas and family
Christmas Spirit, acrostic poem
Holly and Ivy, short story about twins who find each other and had no idea the other existed and learn how important family is
Every Christmas After the Last, free verse with rhyming
Christmas with Gramma, brand new short story about a woman who lives with her elderly grandmother and she has to pay her cousins to come for one last Christmas but in the end they discover what Christmas and family is all about
Yule Greetings, acrostic poem

About the cover- my husband really rescued this cover. You should have seen the one I made, it wasn't so good. In fact it was B-O-R-I-N-G. He really did a nice job with because he made the background come alive and that is exactly what I wanted.

Santa's Shorts is $5.99 now but will go on sale at the end of October. I wanted to release at the end of September so people would be more willing to buy it since it will be on sale and close to the holidays.

One last thing....
I don't know why I am a writer, I guess I've always been a writer even when I wasn't writing. I was always thinking of  stories. I publish my work, I write in my blog because I want to be read. I can write all day long and it doesn't mean much unless I have people to read it. I want to be read, I want to entertain you. You want to be entertained, don't you? I can't do this (whatever this is, the word is just so dramatic) without you.

Until next time....