Monday, July 25, 2016

Watch the Parties Fall Apart

Just after a week of Donald Trump officially received the Republican nod for president, the Democrats go and have a shit storm of a convention in Philadelphia. The latest is the chair of the DNC sent emails trying to undermine Sanders' campaign, with thoughts of trying to say he he was atheist. Stop right there....

1. Why the fuck does it matter if the person running for president is atheist? Does it make you bad person? All of a sudden you have no morals because you don't believe in god. Ever hear of a thing called separation of church and state? You know what there should BE MORE of that. Unlike the Republicans who wants to push a fake Christian agenda onto a people where there is supposed to FREEDOM of religion as granted by the FIRST AMENDMENT.

2. To try and undermine Sanders' campaign just shows that the Democrats have little faith in Hillary Clinton in winning the nomination. I don't know why that is, but that is pretty pathetic.

3. Clinton Campaign tries to pin the email leak on Russia. Hey, I thought it was 2016, didn't the cold war end? When I first read that, I thought I went back in time. Maybe Putin does care who is President and maybe he would prefer one over the other but I highly doubt the Russian Kremlin hacked into the DNC email system to benefit the Donald. I think Putin is smarter than that  and I am sure if he really wanted Donald in, he would do it more covertly.

4. There is a lot of talk about rigged campaigns. I cannot speak for other states. I voted in the primaries in PENNSYLVANIA. I went to my polling place, there were no lines. They found my name easily as they have for the last several elections. I have been registered to vote since I was 18 (18 years ago). I registered as republican at 18. Changed to an independent later on. In 2007, I switched my party affiliation to democrat to vote in the primaries and never switched it back. I don't normally vote in primaries, but I vote in all the elections in November.  Anyway Clinton won Pennsylvania in 2016 and I didn't see anything about voter fraud and other problems. But then again maybe Sanders never really cared about Pennsylvania. I know we are not as big as California or New York but we quite a few delegates up for grabs. And if the DNC were fucking with polling places, I guess they didn't care about Pennsylvania anyway.  I also never vote straight ticket. 

Of course not be outdone or more mature than the Republicans,  half the democrats hate Hillary Clinton. Hate her so much  that there are protests and booing and sorts of adult things going on. Oh yeah the Democrat party is fractured big time. And let's not forget some Bernie supporters are going green. That is really effective since Jill Stein is not on every state's ballot. Gary Johnson is but since he doesn't offer free college, I guess he is nothing but a reasonable individual with good thoughts.

So let's all cry that Bernie Sanders is not the nominee and huff and puff and make a big ole fuss. And here are your options in November:

1. Stay the fuck home.

2. Write Bernie Sanders in

3. Vote for Jill Stein or I guess write her in since she is not on all the state's ballots

4. Vote for Gary Johnson, libertarian which is a party I am thinking of joining. I am having a hard time accepting the platform the Republicans are standing behind. Democrats have more I agree with. The Libertarian has the most I agree with except for the economic plans, which I tend to fall with democrats on that one. Okay, I may not be old enough to really know, but here's my thought. I am 36. Reagan was elected in November of 1980 with his thoughts of trickle down. It is now 2016 and the only thing I see is more money at the top and nothing at the bottom. In fact, I would have to win a large Powerball to even make it to the top. Because even if I were to become a doctor I still would only be in the middle. Hard work doesn't get you where you used to.

5. Vote for Donald Trump

6. Vote for Hillary

7. Vote for congress and write your favorite cartoon character for president. I cannot stress this enough. At least vote for the members of congress. And if you don't know why, then maybe you should go to school with the immigrants who have to learn all about this country so they can be a citizen.

Sunday, July 24, 2016

Turning 36

Last week (July 15), I turned 36. It is sort of a weird age. I don't feel any different than I did maybe six years ago, except I creak a hell of a lot more than I used to.  I don't feel old or antique. And lately, it has sort of dawned on me that parents are 60 and turning 59. It's not that I didn't know that before, it just seems like my time with them is running out. I wonder what  kind of things they thought about when they were my age. It's not just that, but my kid turned 12 in June. All of this just puts me in a weird place, there are thoughts I want to think of but I can't find the words. Most of the time, I feel like I am still 25, and  everyone else around me is getting older. I don't have gray hair, but I am fine with the grays. And maybe that's why I don't feel 36. Although I secretly hope that when I am old, I have white hair like my grandmother. It's sort of like blonde but  not.

I thought I would be a lot further along in my writing career than I am now. I go in these waves of working hard and sending away stuff. But of course, I also get  rejections up the ass. All rejections all the time. So maybe I am just good enough to be a writer. I am having a hard time writing lately. I had all these plans for 2016, which were flushed down the toilet. I have ideas, yet no ambition. Sometimes, I tell myself I just need a nibble, of someone in the world telling me I'm okay. But, then I suppose that is addicting,  the constant need of "atta boy." I don't give myself a pat on the back because I don't deserve them; I am just not good at writing. If that is the case, what then? All my life I thought of myself as a writer. Here I am about halfway through my life and I feel like I am just floating along like a dry hot wind from the west.

In my wind storm of thoughts and story ideas, I am lost and I don't know what to do. I always think like a writer and read like a writer and I don't know what to do with myself if I weren't a writer. I try not think like that. It creeps up all the time though. It is frustration and confusion and anger. Why can't I just be good enough, at least just once. I don't see it in myself. I can't stop comparing myself to any other writer and wonder what the hell is wrong with my work.

I suppose it is hard to explain.  I sit around wondering how other people's, normal, non writers brains work and maybe my brain is not right. Because I would like to feel normal once and maybe I can see something I didn't before.